Founder and President of Heroic Hearts Project Jesse Gould was a member of the U.S. Army’s elite 75th Ranger Regiment. He told SOAA about his travels to Peru to find healing through a series of ayahuasca journeys when he struggled to transition back into the civilian world following his service.
Returning to the Civilian World
Between 2010 and 2014, Gould served with the 1st Battalion of the 75th Ranger Regiment, leading a mortar platoon section consisting of over 30 individuals. Gould deployed three times to Afghanistan during the course of his service before transitioning back into the civilian world.
Though there were programs within the Army to assist with the physical aspects of transition, he found that “there’s no program to mentally transition” veterans.
Gould had worked in finance on Wall Street prior to becoming a Ranger. With that expertise, he expected he “was just going to hit the ground running” back in the civilian world. Instead, he found that “inside there was this struggle” as he developed bad habits and increasingly put himself “in these overtly risky situations.”
One day, help arrived as Gould listened to an episode of the Joe Rogan podcast about ayahuasca. At first, Gould was resistant to the idea of using ayahuasca, but “over the course of weeks, when I was still miserable,” he explained that “it just became more of an idea.”
Ayahuasca is a potent brew consisting of the hallucinogenic dimethyltryptamine (DMT), which is found naturally in many animals and plants, and a plant containing a monoamine oxidase inhibitor (MAOI) designed to extend DMT’s effects. Recent research indicates that ayahuasca can have significant antidepressant effects.
Hopeful about the benefits he researched, Gould packed all his belongings and purchased a one-way ticket to a retreat center in Peru that offered ayahuasca in an indigenous setting.
At a remote location in the Amazon, Gould went through four ayahuasca ceremonies. “Each experience lasts about four or five hours where you’re in this very intense psychedelic state,” Gould related. “The first night and the second night were an all-out ass-kicking.” And though he said that the psychedelic experience “scared the hell out of me,” Gould said that it also “earned my respect.”
Using ayahuasca “taught me through experience that I can release the tension. I can release that control over things.” Gould said that he also found that after using ayahuasca, he could work through the anxiety and hyper-vigilance he normally experienced in a crowded room.
Following his own experience, Gould said that he supports state-level legislation to give veterans more options to take control of their mental health, substance use, or addictions. “They deserve at least to know that there are other options,” Gould explained.
Since we spoke with Gould, President Donald Trump signed an executive order in April easing access to research into psychedelics to fight back against suicide in the veteran community. In July, the Departments of Veterans Affairs and Health and Human Services signed a five-year memorandum of understanding (MOU) to cooperate on psychedelic research, clinical development, and deployment of treatment.
Given the success that veterans like Gould have experienced with alternative medicines, SOAA continues to advocate for further research into the wide variety of psychedelic treatments that have shown promise in combating depression, substance use, traumatic brain injury, and post-traumatic stress disorder.
